A Handful of Dust

Ebay

I sold 100 of my less watched DVD's on Ebay a few days ago, for a very reasonable price, and the high bidder hasn't contacted me about payment yet, which is the first time that's ever happened to me. I am a big fan of Ebay, having bought and sold lots of interesting stuff there in the last couple of years.

It's been 3 days since the auction ended, and my instructions clearly stated that payment was to be received in 3 days time. However, being the sweet and lovable guy that I am, I'll give the bidder until Monday ( 2 more days) before I complain to Ebay and begin the process of ruining this bidders reputation. Bastards.

Alan and I are waiting for the Chinese food that we ordered over an hour ago to arrive, but no luck yet. Is there a pattern here?

hp

Fox News and Al Franken

I just finished Al Franken's new book "Lies, and the Lying Liars Who Tell Them", and I have to tell you, it's the best political satire I have ever read. There were parts of that book where i was laughing so hard I couldn't breathe. There's one part where he tells a fictional story about an incident in Vietnam, where the characters are Newt Gingrich, Rush Limbaugh, Bill O'Reilly, George W. Bush, etc. (you get the idea), with John Kerry and Al Gore as Our Heroes. It was crude and sophomoric, but I was laughing so hard I almost wet myself. I think Al Franken is a very smart and savvy political thinker, but I never found him to be terribly funny until I read his book. He's much funnier in print than in person, which is a little odd, but there it is.

He's been on CNN a lot lately, and he was on Bill Maher's HBO show a couple of weeks ago. Bill Maher asked him what he thought about the people at Fox (they sued him over his book), and he said:

"What can I say about the people over at Fox News?" Pause. "Well, they're huge assholes."

That's paraphrased, but you understand, I'm sure. I think everyone should read this book, it's fucking great!

hp

Serial Mom

I just came across some wvas from the movie "Serial Mom" with Kathleen turner, Sam Waterston, Matthew Lillard and Ricki Lake. It's a completely stupid movie, but it cracks me up. I have added a couple of the sounds here. It's quite amusing. Fair warning, the language is quite filthy, so don't say you didn't know.


Serial Mom 3
Serial Mom 4
Serial Mom 5
Serial Mom 10
Serial Mom 14
Serial Mom 15
Serial Mom 17

Mother Hen

Ok so I have been up for almost 24 hours. Let's back track a bit. At about 4 pm yesterday Drew's dad and I were working on my car (I'll spare all the details). So when we were done with my car Doug came over (he is a str8 friend of ours but we think he played in the minor league if you get my drift) and we went out to eat. We had a lot of fun, all of us were in a great mood and I even told the waitress that she needed me to be her gay best friend. On our way home Drew and Doug wanted to get drunk. I don't drink because I don't do well if I do (I'll tell that story another time). So they get some Alcohol and we come home to the ass Michael. Now Michael has been friends with Drew for a long time. He even lived with Drew and his parents for a several months before they found he was stealing from them, so they gave him the boot. Now Michael is the product of misfortune. His family is crazy and like kicked him out when he was 16 and he has had it rough. Guess what who hasn't? Helping some one in a hard time is fine, but you can't dwell on it. I had some crazy shit in my life, but I got over it and I believe I became a better person. Any one can just wine, but I think it takes a strong person to say, well I am not going to just sit here and be dependant, I am going to make something of myself! Well I guess some people haven't but every one has their own battles and such. Now the point of me telling you all about Michael is because I can't stand him. I have a very hard time being nice or even polite to people I don't like. Well that’s not all true, I can but it depends on how much they bug me and what not. Michael is the kind of person who likes to get everything he can from other people with out giving anything back. He also is inconsiderate. Now let me ask you, if you get in a fight with a friend, and they hang up on you how many times would you call back? 20 you say, then you would be good friends with Michael. He just is the rudest little thing. POINT they were doing laundry over here, and so that made a million peeps at the house (Doug, who brought Josh and I left out Tara but she was here to, Drew and myself and Michaels crazy girl friend). So Michael being him self was rude, so I had to ask him to leave. Drew not saying anything didn't help, because they didn't leave. So I talked to Howard for about two hours. Howard is great, he knows how to calm me down and get my head clear from all my drama. I hope I don't seem like a big drama queen, I just feel like it just comes to me. I think you need just a tad bit to keep life interesting, but some times I think I live in a fucking soap opera.

At 2 am Drew's dad had to get up for work so I made him some coffee and helped get him ready. Now at this point I am ready to have fun. Phil is gone (Drew’s dad) Michael has left, and I can chill with my friends. Nope. Josh and Tara fell asleep. And Drew and Doug are sick as dogs. I mean Sick. Just sickness all over the place. Had to carry them to the bathroom change sheets and all that uck. I have been cleaning and making sure no one get too sick. I am mother hen today. HA. So I have to get Doug up for work in an hour then I should be able to go to bed. I am thinking I will just stay up or something. Well it has been real; I hope you got a good laugh out of this because I know I will in the next day or so.

Crotch Waffles

hi kids! I am not going to make a real post here because I'm pretty tired now, and I'm going to bed. However, I am happy to say that my Chiefs kicked the shit out of the Houtsons Texans today, so Go Chiefs!

Also, I just finished reading Al Franken's new book, which you can see listed off to the side if you're interested. Anyway, it's a great read, one of the funniest books ever. I was reading it in bed last night, and I was laughing so hard I started choking and coughing, and woke up Alan. mind you, Alan can sleep though a plane crash. I definitely reccomend this book. He's pretty savage to a lot of people, especially Ann Coulter and Bill O'Reilly, but then again, they shouldn't tell so many lies. If you can win an argument with the truth, you should give up and try to do something else. How is it people can feel any sense of accomplishment when they spend so much time making up "facts" and misquoting and otherwise deceiving their viewers. It's so sad that these guys feel that their case is so weak that they have to bolster it artifically.

Oh well, enough preaching for tonight. I'll be back with a vengeance in the morning.

hp

Fish Sticks

Now I know I am a big dork. Well to some. I like Star Trek a lot, but I am not a freak that dresses up and goes to conventions and stuff, but I do like to watch the show a lot. Today on UPN they had a Voyager marathon. So of course I watched it. I love Captain Janway. She is a strong woman, but yet is still a person. I think Kate Mulgrew does a great job of portraying the character. So of course by me watching Voyager for six hours pissed Drew off but he'll get over it.

Other then that it was an uneventful day. However now there are a bunch of kiddies at my house. Well my father-in-law’s house. Teenagers are just too odd for me. They eat and are always on cell phones. OOPS, I am bitching. Sorry about that. So I am only 22 and some times I feeling and act like I am 80. I am all for fun, but I guess I see fun different then every one else. Well we are about to go do something so I guess I will go now.

Clinton Behind Clark Campaign

I was right! I knew Bill and Wesley Clark had to much in common not be linked somehow. According to this NY Times story, Bill and Hillary are big suppoerters of Gen. Clark. You can read the text of that story here.

ARRRR, MATEY!!

Ahoy buckos, today be talk like a pirate day. Here's a few links so you can annoy all of yer matey's by talking like a pirate all day, or maybe buy a "Talk Like a Pirate" thong. Arrrr!

http://www.cafeshops.com/talklikeapirate
http://www.talklikeapirate.com/piratehome.html

Design

I just want all of you to know that getting the design of this fucker just the way we want it is a nightmare. Joey and I don't like the same colors, so it's slow going, but we'll get there, hopefully before we die.

Oy Vey!

Ok, this is the first post in the new space for our blog. Joey and I are very excited about this, since the features here seem to be so much better than they were at our previous spot on Blogger. Of course, I have to pay a nominal fee for these features, but you can't expect anything good in life for free. At least, that's what my Dad always told me, but then, he's a generally negative person.

I am trying to import al the posts from Blogger, but I haven't made it work so far. I guess you'll know I was successful when you see a bunch of posts from August here. I shall keep trying.

Come to think of it, I don't think joey is excited about this at all, since I haven't told him that I did this. I should probably let him know what's going on.